To all of you who are hurting. . .

My heart goes out to you all who have suffered a loss. I do grieve with you, think of you, and pray for you even though I have not met you. Thank you for sharing your heart with me.

Some of you have been writing comments that are forwarded to my e-mail, but I have no way to respond unless I post my response on the blog for everyone to read. If you would be so kind as to include your e-mail in your comment, that would be helpful for me to be able to respond to you individually. Nona, I would love to hear how your doctor appointment went today.

Please hang on to your hope--as the song by Steven Curtis Chapman encouraged me, "we can grieve with hope; we can cry with hope." and of course my theme verse, "Against all hope, Abraham believed. . ." from Romans 4.

Surprise!

Announcing the surprise arrival of Anna Noelle Huitink

born Sunday, December 14 at 11:43pm

7 pounds, 4 ounces

19.5 inches

lots of dark hair with blond highlights :)

The picture of me pregnant was taken December 13, and then Sunday night I started bleeding again--so it was off to the hospital to have a baby! There was only one, but that is just fine with me :) She was huge for being 5 weeks early--I don't think I would have been able to make it much longer :)

We are thankful for our miracle, and amazingly, we brought her home Thursday afternoon, the same date that we lost Grace last year (December 18) and the day of the week that Grace was "born." Isn't God amazing? I couldn't have planned it any better myself.

As far as the name--we had always planned on naming our first daughter Anna after my grandmother (and because we like the name). Awhile back we wanted to make sure we really wanted to name her that, and when we looked up the meaning of the name it means "full of grace," "grace," "gracious." So, of course, knowing that God was restoring what was lost, it was pretty amazing that her name meant Grace, and we never questioned the name again. We chose Noelle, because she redeemed Christmas for us. As I explained before, 3 Christmases ago, Scott was about to leave for Iraq, then the next year we were apart, and then last year we had just lost Grace. Now, we have an amazing Christmas blessing (and I'll be recovered by then :)

We're doing well--she is so sweet. She cries when she's hungry or when her diaper needs to be changed or she wants to snuggle. I'm still sore from the C Section but getting a little better every day.

Well, it looks like this ends the story of my blog (until maybe I'm pregnant with twin boys :) . We have created a Facebook page, so let us know if you want to keep in touch that way :)

Blessings to you all! God is amazing, and He keeps His promises!

Excitement. . .

First off, I wanted to share the picture of me from a couple of weeks ago at my baby shower. My best friend from college, Lacey, is a tiny person so I dwarf her, but you can still see how big I've gotten--and that was at 32 weeks!

Well, this Wednesday morning I had heavy bleeding, and after I saw the doctor he admitted me to the labor and delivery unit for observation. Then I started having contractions pretty often, so it got kind of scary for awhile--I was a little overwhelmed by the thought that I might deliver that day, 6 weeks early, not being prepared at all! We had an ultrasound late in the afternoon that showed I have placenta previa, and an edge of the placenta had come up (which caused the bleeding). So, the doctor kept me in the hospital overnight, because if I started to bleed again, he was going to do a C-section. I went home yesterday, and now I'm on a modified bed rest. The plan from here is to schedule a C-section in 4 weeks, but if I start bleeding again, we'll go ahead with the C-section. So, 4 weeks or less now! I can find plenty of quiet things to do around the house, but it is hard to not walk a lot (I'll think of something to do, but it's in another part of the house). Thankfully Scott will be home again this weekend, and my mom will probably come stay some next week. I can't complain too much when the doctor tells me I'm not allowed to grocery shop any more!

After I was home last night, I think my emotions got ahold of me--just being overwhelmed with the previous day's events and then my brain was associating a lot of my experiences with last December's experiences--going to the hospital, long ultrasounds where I can't see what's going on (after we had known the other baby had died) and then coming home without a baby, still looking and feeling pregnant (even though this time I still am) all kind of made my psyche a little tricked. Thankfully this morning I could wake up and know I was still pregnant, whereas last year I was waking up and saying to myself the next morning "I'm not pregnant anymore," even though I looked like it. Our little girl is still moving around just as much, and any time I can make her wait will always be better. Thankfully I know that if she were to deliver now, she would be just fine, even though she would be a few weeks early. She's still showing large or ahead of schedule so that's good, too. Some of you may be wondering what this ultrasound showed--it was pretty thorough, and it only showed one baby (Scott and I both were wondering if God was going to reveal something). Of course at this point, I still believe God has the power to do anything He wants--we only have 4 weeks left to find out. Although as soon as I thought the reality was still only 1 baby, yesterday a Christian lady randomly told me another story about how a lady had dreamt that she would have triplets, and then when her delivery came, she ended up having triplets, while the whole pregnancy they thought she only had twins. (I hadn't told her any of my story). And of course, as I was looking up placenta previa last night, the first page I came to said that this condition is more common for women who are carrying multiple babies. It could very well be a coincidence, but I guess at this point I'm going to pack an extra outfit for a boy just in case it's necessary when I deliver :) I don't want to make a bigger deal about these things, but it's always ironic to me that as soon as I think "science" has proven only 1 baby, something else will come up. Just as God spoke so clearly to me before "don't let your faith only be fueled by evidence" I have to wonder if He was meaning more than just at the beginning of the pregnancy. Evidence showed then that the baby had died/there was no baby, but for several weeks we kept believing, and the doctor said it was a miracle when we saw her!

Interesting. . .

Scott gave me a gift certificate for a prenatal massage (so sweet of him and so needed!) A doula (kind of like a midwife-specializes in keeping you comfortable during labor and delivery) performed the massage, and at the very end she asked if I minded her rubbing my belly. I said "no," and as soon as she started, she said "are you sure there's only one baby in here?" I couldn't believe my ears. I briefly told her the story (knowing it sounded crazy as I was telling it). She kept feeling around and mentioned the 3 areas that I always wonder about (as far as where is the head, rear, etc.) and she couldn't understand how it would be just one. I explained to her that we had another ultrasound a couple of weeks ago, and it showed only one, but that maybe God wasn't ready to reveal it until delivery. So, I'll let you ponder that one. . .as of right now I have 4-6 weeks to go, but if it's twins, it will be more like 3 weeks. I guess I better pack a bag just in case :)