Monday, February 27, 2012

Joy and Sorrow

I'm 35, but in my short life, I have observed many griefs--not my own, but from people close to me.  February is one of those months that stirs up remembrances.  When I was 13, my grandmother died on this day.  I remember it so vividly, and I still think of her often.  My cat awakened me at the exact time she died (although I did not know she had died until my father picked me up from school).  My mother was with her when she took her last breath and entered Heaven.  I remember watching my mother grieve that year, which prepared me to be sensitive to others going through grief.  In college, a friend from Little Rock who was also attending Baylor with me was killed in a car accident on February 5.  She was engaged, and it was tough seeing those dreams diminish and the grief that her family had to go through.  February 5 is special for the cousins whose birthday it is, but years later I think of Doug on this day--it's his birthday as well.  I think of his mom and Nicole on that day and how much they must miss him.  He was KIA in Iraq.  Nicole has recently released her book Nic's Revelations about everything she has learned about Heaven and God since Doug was killed.  https://www.createspace.com/3653957
February 27 is also the day that my aunt passed away and then my cat died in my mom's lap.  There's something special about this date--sorrow mixed with joy.  It's other people's birthdays, my brother-in-law for one.  I just received the news that our friends in Germany who supported us so much after we lost Grace had a baby boy just a little while ago. (he wasn't scheduled to be born until March 5).  Shannon asked me to pray for a miracle for her to have another baby (they have a 12-year-old daughter so they have waited a long time!), and I must admit, my prayers for her had dwindled.  The amazing thing about their story--God spoke to their daughter that Shannon was pregnant--and she laughed, just like Sarah in the Bible when God told Abraham that they would have a baby in their old age, even after Sarah's womb had been closed.  But, indeed, Shannon was pregnant, and their baby boy just made his appearance into the world.  Oh what joy!  He's here!  After so many years of waiting!  We rejoice with them.
Another story of sorrow and joy--one year ago, Addie was born on February 9.  She lived 6 days and passed away in her mother's arms on February 15.  Now Kristen is in labor to give birth to their baby boy a year later.  Oh what joy, again!
February 23 marks the date one year ago that another friend lost her mom.  And it marks the birthday of yet another friend who recently lost her mother.  And my dad's cousin who passed away a year ago--the list goes on of loved ones lost.  And I'm constantly reminded of others who have recently lost mothers.  I don't feel old but yet my heart breaks to have so many friends who have lost parents.  It does make me treasure each day I have left with mine--but also keenly aware of how short time can be.  I think about all of these things while hearing daily about others whose loved ones are fighting cancer, losing babies or other trials.  You all weigh heavily on my heart as I think about what each of you are going through--your grief journey or your fight against cancer.  These 2 births today did my heart good to be able to rejoice with these families on a day and in a month that reminds us of so much sadness.  I also thought they might encourage anyone who has recently lost a baby or who is waiting for a baby.  Your time will come whether through pregnancy or adoption!  These baby boys today give us hope and joy!